Saturday, July 23, 2016

Blair Witch Is Coming!!!!

Picture it..... Charleston, WV 1999.  A young, gay boy coming to terms with himself and his charming boyfriend arrive at the new multiplex at the Southridge Centre shopping complex.  The two young men had no particular movie in mind, they had no agenda....just looking to pass the time.  They see a peculiar looking poster for a movie with half of a girl's face on it and some trees called The Blair Witch Project.  Not knowing much about it they decide to go ahead and check it out.  Little did they know they would spend the next 90 minutes in sheer and utter terror.  That young gay boy was me....and the other was...Pablo Picasso.  Ok, ok The Golden Girls made up that last part.

The Blair Witch Project has had its fair share of hate over the years.  "Nothing happens!", "It's BORING",  "You don't even see a witch!"  For me though that is what made it terrifying...and I was terrified.  You see my imagination is far scarier than anything you could put on celluloid.  I was transfixed on these characters.  Not only did I truly care about each of them, I felt like I was with them in the woods.  The fear of isolation is palpable in this film as it never really lets up.  They get more lost....and more lost....and more lost, all the while experiencing strange and often horrifying occurences throughout the night and mornings.  The sense of dread is ridiculously present and you never really know what is lurking around and tree, a bush, or in the creek....and as we now know yiu never really get to find out.  I left the theatre with 100 scenarios of what could have happened to these poor characters.  Was it a drug addict?  Was it the one who disappeared first?  Was it actually the spirit of a witch?  These possibilities are what kept me up at night.....well that and checking behind my shower curtain because I knew Miss Thing was in there ready to tear me apart.   The film truly stayed with me and continues to hold up today....which leads me to our next chapter!!!

A few months back I caught a trailer online for a found footage movie called "The Woods."  It looked really good and after researching it I found out it was to be released in September and is directed by the glorious Adam Wingard, director of the grossly underrated "You're Next."  Needless to say I was very excited but months went by with really no more news or updates....then THIS WEEKEND HAPPENED. 

At Comic Con in San Diego there was a screening of "The Woods." and as the audience sat comfortably in their seats it was revealed in the credits....simply.... BLAIR WITCH.  The crowd went wild and everyone sat back and saddled up for their surprise!  What they experienced is what some reviewers are calling "One of the scariest films in years." and "The sequel we have been waiting for!" (There was once a wretched sequel but I'm not going there....although that goth girl was the tits.)  The internet world of horror has been abuzz for a few days since the news that Miss Ellie would be back to terrify us.  I, for one welcome her with open arms and can't wait to see what this sequel has to offer!

Happy Slashing Little gay boys and Little gay girls!